Connor: Blog Of The Day

Heroic Activity

By Connor M. Jones

     One day Grandma and Grandpa were in Vietnam when suddenly a group of monsters appeared from out of nowhere.  Frightened, Grandma and Grandpa fled toward the hotel.  When everyone thought the end of the world was near a hero appeared.  The hero said "Never fear, Captain Mixed Message is here!"  Captain Mixed Message used his powers of confusion against the monsters.  The monsters seemed to not be effected by the attempt to confuse them.

     Cthulu moved toward a building and smashed it.  Then Captain Mixed Message used sarcasm to trick Cthulu into fixing the building.  The minotaur grabbed Grandma and Grandpa and carried them away to the evil lair.  Cthulu started smashing streets, cars, and Internet Cafes.  A werewolf started chasing mailmen and a vampire turned civilians against Captain Mixed Message.

     Captain Mixed Message used his powers of confusion in order to undo the vampire's mind control.  The civilians grabbed stakes and garlic and started chasing down the vampire.  The vampire was dead, but the other three monsters were still on a rampage.  The werewolf now had an army of werewolves and was moving toward Captain Mixed Message.  Captain Mixed Message reached into the left hand pocket of the utility belt and pulled out his silver paradox, a big weapon that logically shouldn't have fit in the belt pocket.

     Just touching the silver paradox to a werewolf's head would change it back to a human.  Touching the silver paradox to the main werewolf's head however killed it.  Two monsters were dead and that left only two more.  A dragon the size of a small apartment building was causing harm to all sorts of buildings, while Cthulu was now edging closer to Captain Mixed Message.  Captain Mixed Message read the necronomicron backwards and managed to send Cthulu back into a book by H. P. Lovecraft. 

     That just left the minotaur and the dragon, who had appeared randomly.  Captain Mixed Message used his dragon scale sword and slew the dragon, by rolling a one hundred on a twenty sided die.  Captain Mixed Message then attacked the minotaur.  However the minotaur moved to the side and Captain Mixed Message crashed into a wall.  Suddenly the minotaur moved toward him and laughed evilly.  This gave Captain Mixed Message the chance to destroy him with mixed messages and fly away into the night.