Connor: Blog Of The Day 2

Lincoln The Slayer

By Connor M. Jones

        It was a usual day at the theater in Washington D.C.  There I stood in front of a captive audience on the enemy's turf.  I hid my fangs as I walked to the backstage area.  I knew he was there, Abraham Lincoln, the man who slew my kind.  I looked at him from behind the curtain examining his serious face.  He couldn't see me, but I could see him and he was unaware of my true nature.  The war and waste of precious blood was his fault and the fault of the Head Vampire Jefferson Davis.  Davis previously had surrendered to Lincoln in hopes of not being slain.

    The war ended this year.  Lincoln took a break too soon, shouldn't have gone with his wife to this play.  I could hear the audience's hearts beating to a beat much like that a drummer boy would play.  Some hearts seemed to beat to the tune of Dixie.  The others beat to the tune of Yankee Doodle.  There were only a few vampires in the audience and I was the only one in the cast.  Abe claimed to be honest, but would never admit to the public, his wife, or general Grant why he went to war.  My name was William Shakespeare, but my name for the time period was John Booth.  I turned in the 16th century right before I started writing plays.  It was easy to write the plays, once I noticed what I had before I turned.

    At one point I was human, not having to change my name each century.  I was just an average lady's man of the time.  I was a poet, I had quite a way with words the ladies all seemed to think.  Now I'm a vampire standing here in front of a slayer.  He wasn't like the other slayers before him.  Lincoln was nothing like Jefferson or Washington and most certainly wasn't like King James I.  Lincoln didn't schedule duels for his honor or anything of that sort.  Nor did the jerk practically send people on witch hunts.  No, Lincoln settled his disputes the "American" way if speaking didn't work he fought for "what he believed in" meaning he fought to kill us all.

       Lincoln sat there watching the play as the actor playing Polonius fumbling over his soliloquy.  While he had his attention on the play I saw one vampire lean over and attempt to kill him.  He simply stabbed the vampire in the chest and it turned to dust.  Polonius couldn't seem to remember his lines so I walked away from the backstage into the crowd.  From Lincoln's perspective I must have blended in with the crowd for he didn't notice me.

    I walked into the presidential box and stood there, assuming the role of a nameless guard.  I convinced the other guards to leave using my powers of mind control and closed the curtain.  I stood there with Lincoln, curtain closed so none could see.  His wife left with the secret service While I stood there with him.  Once I moved toward him fangs bared he knew what I was, but not who I was.  Unaware that if he staked me the play would end he reached for a stake.  I said quickly "Mr. President, we meet at last!  Allow me to introduce myself, I am William.  As for you Mr. Ex-President.  You are my late lunch."

      Abe grabbed his stake and threatened me with it.  As he sat and pointed the stake at me I grabbed it out of his hand quickly and said "Surely you jest.  With this stake you finished the war single handed.  You wouldn't want that stake to be used against you now would you?  Allow me to put it this way, the fact that you are here at my mercy, and all, means I have the choice should you live or die?"

       Abe looked me in the face and tried guessing my age.  He was quite rude, you never guess someone's age the first time they threaten you.    His guess was off by a long shot, he thought I was only one hundred years old!  At this point I said "This is almost the same type of scenario as a play I wrote.  To be or not to be, ring any bells?  Maybe you know all my plays, someone of your 'high intellect.'   Well, you killed my kinsmen and for that I must kill you."  With that I stabbed him through the heart, because I didn't want to suck his blood.  Besides he probably drank holy water, which wouldn't have been good for me.

      I walked out of the booth just in time.  The guards had gotten suspicious of me.  As I casually walked out I heard people scream "The President is dead!" and "Where is Booth!"  At that point I started running, if I flew I would no doubt be spotted and killed or die by sunlight.  Fortunately I had my umbrella.  I went to jail for that, but after faking my own death, not hard when you sleep upside down and are immortal and incapable of   suicide without a stake.  Next I will be back taking on the form of a politician as soon as I kill him.